Yesterday I had a meltdown.
Jul. 4th, 2019 11:22 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
readerjaneA manager who had requested some reporting from me last week had asked for an addendum, and I'd delivered that the day before. Yesterday she replied that oh no, she didn't want the turnaround time for the whole list of orders I'd initially sent her; she only wanted TAT for the twenty orders she'd highlighted. I replied, you have the TAT for all the orders on the list, including the twenty you highlighted. But, she said, she wanted only those twenty.
I very nearly sent a snarky reply. Had it all worded out in my head: "You are a competent, professional woman with strong keyboarding skills. I have confidence in your ability to delete the rows you don't want out of a spreadsheet." I'd been struggling all that day to shovel the small issues out of my Inbox so I'd have the afternoon free (a quiet afternoon, I'd been hoping, it being the day before a holiday) to focus on a long-overdue large project. And here this manager had the gall to ask me to prune a list for her when she was perfectly capable of pruning it herself.
I started checking off the rows she did want so I could delete the rest, and accidentally hit some key combination (I still don't know what that was), which made Excel bring up a Research pane every time I tried to type. Googled for a way to switch the Research function off, found a promising article. My work laptop wouldn't let me visit that site because the site was "suspect". Tried a site further down the list of hits but it didn't tell how to switch off Research.
At that point, since I was working from home and had blessed privacy, I indulged in a short screaming fit.
By the time I was done screaming, my throat hurt, so I decided I'd make myself another iced latte, as the cold would be soothing. Went to the kitchen, ground the coffee beans, put water in the tank, brewed the shots. Then while flushing the espresso machine, I realized I hadn't actually poured the shots over ice yet and now had four shots of diluted espresso instead of two good shots. Told myself, "It's okay, just start over." Ground new beans, tried to brew again, realized the grounds basket was plugged. Cleaned the basket, ground more beans, started over, found that the tank (which I'd filled intending to brew only two shots) was now empty. Re-filled the tank, started again.
Iced latte in hand, I went back to my desk. I Googled again, figured out how to turn off Research in Excel, re-ran the TAT report from scratch with only the twenty orders the manager wanted, then finally spent some time (though not enough to get very far) on the big project.
I'm tired. I'm tired of having to fight for the right to concentrate. I'm tired of having to say "I don't have time for that," and having requestors go right on insisting. I miss being able to immerse myself in a puzzle and keep at it until it's done. I'm tired of being tired.
I very nearly sent a snarky reply. Had it all worded out in my head: "You are a competent, professional woman with strong keyboarding skills. I have confidence in your ability to delete the rows you don't want out of a spreadsheet." I'd been struggling all that day to shovel the small issues out of my Inbox so I'd have the afternoon free (a quiet afternoon, I'd been hoping, it being the day before a holiday) to focus on a long-overdue large project. And here this manager had the gall to ask me to prune a list for her when she was perfectly capable of pruning it herself.
I started checking off the rows she did want so I could delete the rest, and accidentally hit some key combination (I still don't know what that was), which made Excel bring up a Research pane every time I tried to type. Googled for a way to switch the Research function off, found a promising article. My work laptop wouldn't let me visit that site because the site was "suspect". Tried a site further down the list of hits but it didn't tell how to switch off Research.
At that point, since I was working from home and had blessed privacy, I indulged in a short screaming fit.
By the time I was done screaming, my throat hurt, so I decided I'd make myself another iced latte, as the cold would be soothing. Went to the kitchen, ground the coffee beans, put water in the tank, brewed the shots. Then while flushing the espresso machine, I realized I hadn't actually poured the shots over ice yet and now had four shots of diluted espresso instead of two good shots. Told myself, "It's okay, just start over." Ground new beans, tried to brew again, realized the grounds basket was plugged. Cleaned the basket, ground more beans, started over, found that the tank (which I'd filled intending to brew only two shots) was now empty. Re-filled the tank, started again.
Iced latte in hand, I went back to my desk. I Googled again, figured out how to turn off Research in Excel, re-ran the TAT report from scratch with only the twenty orders the manager wanted, then finally spent some time (though not enough to get very far) on the big project.
I'm tired. I'm tired of having to fight for the right to concentrate. I'm tired of having to say "I don't have time for that," and having requestors go right on insisting. I miss being able to immerse myself in a puzzle and keep at it until it's done. I'm tired of being tired.
